Wednesday 3 April 2013

Blogs for Happiness #5: Kinder>School>Real World-How do the Transition Programs stack up?


Having a four year old at Kinder we’re starting to look at schools. The Transition Program has started already, and it’s only March. There is a great deal of emphasis on ensuring each child is comfortable and at ease for this huge change in life.
Some schools start their transition visits next month, and a part of me is crying out “Can’t they just enjoy being four?” What’s the rush, I ask? But perhaps those schools aren’t for us.
We had a lovely time recently at a local school fair and for the first time ever my son left my side to chase other boys around the yard. It was water pistols at 20 feet for an hour and a half. Coincidentally I chose to get some shade at the stall that was run by the Prep teacher and now I’m loaded up with brochures on ‘The Friendly School’.
As a result, when we drive past that school now, McEwan says ‘That’s my school I’m going to with Rider’. Even when we point out other schools, and other friends going to it, he’s quite determined. It’s very sweet and reassuring to see his confidence and certainty.
What I like about this school that we’ll probably choose is the continued emphasis on creativity and fostering individual interests. Toddlers learn that imagination and exploration of their world is so important. Just look at all the toys that are made to encourage these skills.
We are also, much to the parents’ relief, reassured about differences in development as each child is expected to be at different levels of capability. For a while I was concerned that McEwan was ‘behind’ in his counting because he showed no interest at all in counting to 20 and all his little mates did. But recently he nailed it, and proceeded to count every item in the house for days on end: the stairs, his cars, the peas, and was hitting his stride in the 30’s and 40’s and on and on.
I imagine the transition into High School from Primary is also implemented with such support, care and attention to the child’s comfort.
However, I am starting to question how well we transition teenagers into the real world from High School. I started to ponder this whole issue a few weeks back when at the chemist.
Poor McEwan. The dentist has told him to stop sucking his thumb as he has changed the shape of his mouth and his new teeth won’t have enough room to grow in. So now I’m taking this seriously. We’ve tried consequences and rewards-but have realised it’s not behaviour; it’s a habit.
I had finally decided to buy the nasty tasting stuff that you put on your nails. It’s pretty drastic for all of us.
The young sales girl assured me I had chosen the right product. ‘Oh yes, I used to bite my nails terribly’ she said. “It worked really well and I stopped. Oh, except for Year Twelve, at exam time. It didn’t work then.”
Well, that stopped me in my tracks. How could something have been allowed to become so stressful for someone at such a young age? Why did she feel so much pressure that something that was previously toxic to her became powerless to help? Where was the support and transition program in place to ensure that this girl felt comfortable and excited to be taking the next step in life?
What I want to ask is this: why does the Education System transform from encouraging creativity and imagination in young children to squishing it with stressful exams and unreasonable pressure to perform and be rated in boxed-in comparisons with others?
And now I wonder if perhaps parents haven’t been helping either? Can’t we take a lesson from our younger years and foster individualism and creativity in our teenagers too? Surely Blue and Pink hair is just another great drawing brought home to show mum and dad. At what point do parents change from being proud of their children’s artistic abilities and self-expression to grounding them for it? Do you have an insight for me?

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